Of Memories And Other Demons...

-"You love someone..then why don't you tell me her name..?"

-"I can't..I mean I will, but not now.."

-"Well..I know she is here..somewhere near you..right..?"

-"Um-mm... yes, kinda'.."

-"See, if you don't tell me now.. I may never be there for you when you would want me to.."

-"Well..oh..why is it so hard..um-mm..it's you.."

-"What..?"

-"Yes, it's you.. the girl I love.."

-"And..?"

-"And what..?"

-"Won't you say it?"

-"Oh..well..you know..I..I just wanted to say.. I love you.."

-"Why did you take so much time to say this simple thing..?"

-"So..I'll be waiting..take your time..."

...

Part I :

"The Happiest Days of My Life.."

...

Gone are the days my darling..

When you used to be mine.

Blue used to be the sky,

The moon used to shine so bright...

A cluster of words inside my heart..

Like a million tiny bubbles,

With a precise randomness,

Formed and exploded all the time...

Uneasy touches, set the fire easily..

Spreading through my senses,

Untangling my defenses,

Against the will to give my all, every single day..

Gone are the days my darling..

When I used to be so young,

For you, there used to be songs I wrote,

That were lost in the changing times..

...

...

-"You said you love me too...then why do you want to quit..?"

-"I can't...I just can't..we can never be together.."

-"But we can try..if we believe we can,we will...I will be there for you..."

-"But..I can't be..leave me..forget me.."

...

Part II :

"Into the dust.."

...

As I take my steps forward in the dubious present,

Push aside the shady curtains of past..

The forgotten rooms appear once more,

A little discoloured, yet enchanting in presence..

The walls still stand straight on the four sides,

Light still creeps through the windows.

Stepping on the tears of dust on the floor,

I walk out, leaving the fading grey shades inside..

...

...

-"So..did you make any girlfriend..?"

-"Come on.. I don't think you should ask me these questions.. You know what I feel about you."

-"Please..it has been long..why don't you spare me..? I said forget me..I did.."

-"But how can you.. you loved me.."

-"Yes.. I did..but these things happen when we are young... It was a phase of young emotions.. time will make you forget me.."

-"But.. we had dreams..together.."

-"No.. all those dreams.. all you did.. it was always you.. you alone.. I was never a part of it.."

...

Part III :

"The sequel of a disaster.."

...

The words left unsaid, have taken out their wings,

Moist eyes have dried up like dead leaves.

Healed have the wounds, that oozed ethereal pain,

The shattered heart doesn't anymore, dream of rain..

Faces have come and gone since that fateful day,

When one I knew wasn't the same to habituated ways.

Masked by the self-made veil of indifference,

You took the other road, passing by my mortal remains..

...

...

-"Do you have a boyfriend..?"

-"Why are you asking me this question..?"

-"Well..I thought you may have found someone.."

-"Well..yes.."

-"You didn't tell me.."

-"You never asked me.."

-"You love him...??"

-"Yes..of course.. he's my boyfriend, silly..and you should find someone too.."

-"I am happy for you.. Don't worry about me.. I'll be fine without one.."

...

Part IV :

"Coming back to life again.."

...

Here are the times sweetheart..

The times when I am me,

The world is here to see,

And vibrant are the colors, that once escaped my sight..

Waves of thoughts, cross inside my mind..

Crash on the shores,

Break open the locked doors,

And out come as words, riding on a tide..

From the core of my presumptive existence..

Erupt radiant vibes of passion,

In the most unlikely fashion,

On my canvas of life, metaphoric hues it paints..

Here are the times darling..

The times when I am old,

And you have gone cold,

Yet I live on, and all I create, will remain in the light....

The Best Days Of My Life...

The golden decade of the 90's occupies a very special place in the hearts of a few lucky souls who got to witness the decade as children. Not even the deadliest of all Alzheimer's can ever make us forget about our golden childhood days. Even today I feel nostalgic when I think about my days as a kid during the 90's.

So here goes a check-list to see if you were indeed a true 90's kid. The list has been prepared with inputs from myself and all those unforgettable souls who grew up with me during the golden decade. We laughed, cried and lived our lives together, sharing our joys and sorrows along the way ... and from innocent little kids, we are now grown-up adults.

So here goes the list which would hopefully make your eyes go moist. You know you are from familiar times if...

1) You have had aam-er achar and/or chatar matar from the hajmi-walla near your school at some point of time.
2) You know the words like "In-pin-safety-pin" and "ikir mikir chaam chikir" by heart.
3) You have possessed at least one Michael Jackson, and later a Celine Dion cassette.
4) You worshipped Boyzone and thought they were the coolest thing ever until you discovered Rock.
5) After the discovery of Rock, you thought Bryan Adams was the coolest thing ever.
6) Even if you did not play too much, you idolised Kapil Dev.
7) You remember the Dinesh ad with Sunil Gavaskar.
8) You still have a stack of Suktara, Nonte Fonte, Batul the Great and Chacha Chaudhary comics stashed away somewhere.
9) You know what kalo lojens means, and that you could buy them for 20 paise each.
10) You’ve watched Shaktimaan on TV at least once in your life.
11) You watched Cartoon Network, and then TNT, which came after Cartoon Network stopped at 8 pm everyday..
12) You watched ALL the episodes of Small Wonder and Alif Laila.
13) If you are a boy, you collected posters of WWF stars.
14) You still refer to Mumbai as Bombay
15) Your honeymoon with shoes was limited to Bata Naughty Boy/ Ballerina.
12) You have seen Kuch Kuch Hota Hai and Hum Aapke Hain Kaun at least 5 times each
13) You know who Top Cat was.
14) You have played Kumir-Danga, Colourman and Lock & Key.
15) You collected trump cards of wrestlers, cricketers, and actors, and did not quite understand Pokemon, ever.
16) Your parents, at some point of time, told you that "Dark Room" was a bad game to play. But you still loved playing it.
17) You have taken a ride on a double decker bus.
18) You love the song "Made in India" by Alisha Chinoi.
19) You learnt LOGO in school!
20) You have used leaky Artex/Camlin fountain pens, while Wing Sung/Hero ones were reserved for exams. You also know what Chelpark Royal Blue looks like on school uniforms.
21) You often used terms and phrases like 'ey baba', 'same to you with no returns', 'katti katti' and ‘shame shame, puppy shame'
22) You loved and laughed at David Dhawan and Govinda movies.
23) Kissing scenes in Hindi films involved flowers and/or gardens in some way.
24) You have seen Titanic at least 12 times.
25) You thought seeing English movies and speaking English made you the coolest thing ever.
26) You still have a stamp album/slambooks locked away in the cupboard.
27) You had a collection of 'recorded' cassettes, with at least one Eagles/Richard Marx song in it.
28) You spent your afternoons watching Knight Rider, Robocop, Streethawk on DD2.
29) Your idea of being spoiled was limited to the biggest Cadbury bar you got on your birthday and had to share with all your cousins.
30) You know how just awesome Kwality ice creams were.
31) You grew up on Fun Munch, Binnie's chips and Uncle Chips.
32) You know what Fun Munch lime and spice flavour tastes like.
33) You remember the Orissa cyclone, even though you didn’t know what a cyclone was.

34)You were crazy about at least one among "Bewitched" or "I Dream Of Jeannie".

35) GI Joes for boys, and Barbies for girls were the ultimate status symbols. Hot Wheels came a close second, and were available for 22 Rupees a piece

36) At some point or other, "cool" was your favourite, and therefore, most overused word.
37) Captain Planet was your first introduction to environmental consciousness.
38) You know what Mouri Lojens, Roll-a-Cola and Phantom/Charlie Sweet cigarettes taste like.
39) You have seen PC Sorcar (Junior) shows in winter.
40) You loved licking off the cream from the centre of Bourbon biscuits.
43) Drinking Thums Up meant you were a big boy/girl, and you know exactly how awesome Gold Spot was.
44) Speaking of drinks, you have grown up on Bijoligrill Ice Cream Sodas, and Campa Cola made sense to you.
45) You watched Baywatch on Star TV (back when it was Star TV) even though (or because) your parents said you shouldn’t watch it.
46) You bought packets of potato chips for the specific purpose of collecting Tazos. And you had Tazos depicting everyone from Confucius to Daffy Duck to Daffy Duck dressed as Confucius.
47) You have had at least one family member with an Ambassador Mark II with the cool steering-side gear. Other contenders include the Maruti 800, the Premier Padmini and The Fiat. The Contessa was cool because it was bigger.
48) You have heard plays on Prasar Bharati.
49) You spent a good part of 1998 drooling over the Hyundai Santro and the Daewoo Matiz , debating which one was better.
50) You loved Fuzen gum. Earlier on, World Cup bubble gum was the way to go.
51) You bought dalimguli/hojmi guli from the parar dadur dokan, and every para had a dadur dokan.
52) Temporary tattoos made you an overnight rebel.
53) You have taken a train ride to Shantiniketan, on Bolpur Express.
54) School breaks meant playing Chinese Whispers.
55) You kept socks beneath your pillow on Christmas Eve, hoping that Santa would shower his blessings in the form of his choicest gifts.
56) You had to watch Chitrahaar on Sundays with the family, while summer vacations were synonymous with Chuti Chuti.
57) You played and obsessed over Bagatully, our version of the pinball, and eventually lost the little steel ball that came with the box.
58) Business was THE indoor game, while elder cousins were cool because they aced at carom.
59) You Know what Edwards Gripewater was, and loved the ad. Tumi jokhon choto chile, tomakeo khayiechi.
60) You have had a taste of Chutki, even though it was taboo.
61) You went to school in a carpool Ambassador car or a Murir tin minivan, where antakshari was invariably the order of the day.
62) Boys thrived on Sportstar pullouts, while every girl had one poster of a filmstar.
63) Hero cycles, period.
64) You have been to Appu Ghar if you ever visited Delhi, Jhilmil in Calcutta
65) Return gifts meant a candy, pencil, scented eraser and came in small colourful paper packets tied up in string.
66) Stinky gas balloons were a must do in Durga Pujo.
67) Pujo also meant Bhepus and Cap Pistols.

68) Party songs were synonymous with Whigfield, Aqua and Vengaboys.

69) You gorged on Chatar Matar and Swad candies.

70) You would watch WWF keenly every evening/afternoon and really think that Undertaker had seven lives.

71) All school bags/raincoats were from Duckback and were square in shape. Water bottles meant Milton. All water bottles and tiffin boxes had strange cartoon characters that were hybrid versions of seven or eight different characters, and you still bought them, because a green man with a water pistol, boots, a jet-pack, Johnny bravo hair, a rajasthani mustache, gloves, and underwear (long johns) over his pants, called 'Mr. X' was OBVIOUSLY a status symbol.

72) A copy of Amar Chitra Katha or Tinkle used to send you to a world of delightful fantasy.

73) You still remember the Nirma tikia jingle.

74) Every neighbourhood had video cassette parlours.

75) Fevers meant your mom fed you tengri stew and Barley water.
76) You remember the "doodh doodh" ad and also the "roz khao andey" ads.
77) You grew up reading, if you read at all, some or all of Nancy Drews, Enid Blyton books, Hardy Boys, Goosebumps, Sweet Valley series.
78) Your first introduction to Tintin was through Anandamela in Bengali.
79) Railway stations meant Archie comics from Wheeler bookstores.
80) You watched the Bournvita Quiz contest on TV pretty religiously, some of you sat at home and kept scores.
81) Extended family TV time meant Ramayan, Mahabharat and Sree Krishna.
82) After you went to sleep, your parents would watch English films which you knew were not meant for you.
83) Every house had a VCP or a VCR invariably from Akai or Funai.

84) You could party like a rockstar with 10 bucks.

85) In the later 90s, you religiously followed Hip Hip Hooray on Zee Tv.
86) You played 'name place animal thing' in school.
87) You waited for Friendship Day and friendship bands.

88) If you were a boy, you would know what hand cricket means, where the bat and ball are replaced by the palm and a cambiss ball. Girls played the ever superior 'Book Cricket'.

89) Without fail, there would be one desk/bench in school that had the epitaph “in memory of all those who died waiting for the bell to ring.”
90)You have been to Diamond Harbour or the zoo on a picnic.
91) You have taken a tram ride, just for the heck of it.
92) You have known the taste of badam bhaja in a paper thonga.
93) Multiplexes meant nothing to you, as long as there was New Empire, Globe and Lighthouse.
94) Flury's was the ultimate 'once a year' extravagance your parents let you indulge in. You had to earn it.
95) Sunday breakfasts meant gorom jilipi, kochuri and chaa.
96) Your first watch was probably a plastic digital, and anybody with a Casio was understandably, cool.

List of honourable mentions would also include:

97) The Complan boy/girl ad.
98) First taste of rebellion through (mostly) Charminar cigarettes.
99) Kalyani Black label - the beer that existed before all the Tuborgs and Carlsbergs of the world.
100) Toblerone, the esoteric triangle of chocolatey awesomeness that was only permitted thanks to NRI relatives.
101) Also, boasting of NRI relatives was big, back in those days.
102) We also recall every family having some cousin that went to a NIIT/APTECH centre.
103) Speaking of Casio, every thing imported was Made In Japan and every family had one strange variant of the Casio synthesizer keyboard.
104) Finally, when the Internet came to India, we all remember the cyber cafe craze and how every successful connection was preceded by a strange electronic sound comprising of buzz, hum and what sounded like Kraftwerk.

Hope this made you smile. That was pretty much what defined my generation and the small joys we got out of life. No amount of Cafe Coffee Days, multiplexes, I-pods, Playstation PS3s, booze parties, one-night stands, blind dates or grown-up affectations can ever give us back what we grew up with and loved with all our hearts.

Please feel free to copy this and spread the word, provided due credit is given to the evil masterminds behind this behemoth project... :)

SPARE A THOUGHT...only if your mind permits the entry of that thought.

My admission into a Business School has ensured that I now take much more interest in reading business news than I ever did before. Every morning I wake up and open the newspaper to read about interviews of corporate honchos, the latest environment-friendly office building set up by a leading industrial house, multi-billion dollar acquisitions made by multinational corporations, and similar stuff like these. But somewhere down the line they make me wonder... Is business all about these things only? Surely, these are the stuff which make the world go round, no sane person would have the guts to deny that. But what about the man who sits by the dark corner of the pavement in his tiny tea-stall? Doesn’t he do business? He surely does, if we go by the dictionary definition of the word “business”. What about the possibly thousands of small-scale industries in every nook and corner of our huge country? They are responsible for a major share of the GDP of the country, but still they are relegated to the darkest corners of public memory. It is time we opened our eyes to spare a thought for them and acknowledge them for what they are.

As I switched on the television last night, I was greeted by the sight of the svelte and beautiful international supermodel Petra Nemcova in a campaign to promote a new brand of jeans. Is there a single person amongst us who cannot resist the temptation of wearing a pair of “Levis” originals? Sure, wearing a pair of jeans is the ultimate fashion trend and it is also the most comfortable attire, there is no denying that. But the leather tag displaying the status of the wearer is hardly important, isn't it?

If you go out on a hot, sultry day, you will find scores of teenagers crowding in front of soft-drink joints, but not even one among them sipping green coconut water or a glass of creamy lassi. It is not that there is anything wrong in consuming soft-drinks, since I myself am one of the biggest fans of colas. But what is so very wrong with a “desi” refreshment, that the mere thought of drinking it at times of thirst doesn’t even cross our minds? These are just some of the questions which have remained at the back of my mind since I don’t know when, and I do not know if anybody would ever be able to give me a proper answer to my questions. Would you be able to provide an answer?If you indeed can, then please do so. I would be eagerly waiting for your response. So long till my next post.

You are my theme for a dream,

Yes you are, a rare and lovely theme,

The dreams I dream day and night.

--Cliff Richard

What exactly is it that makes a country great? This is one of the many questions which have baffled me since I don't know when. The strangest part is that every individual seems to possess a completely different opinion when it comes to defining the "greatness" of a country. I had walked up to my parents, teachers and friends to ask them the same question, "What makes a country great?" While some some of them replied that it is the richness of her civilization and culture which makes a country great, others opined that greatness is determined by the great men who shaped her destiny through the course of history. Some others were of the opinion that it is the collective attitude & aspirations of the people which separates a "great" country from a "not so great" one.

Well, there can be numerous other opinions and endless debates concerning the issue, but that is not the focus of what I want to say. Has anyone of us ever wondered why India, inspite of possessing almost every attribute that a person could possibly want in a great nation, still continues to be looked upon by many as a Third World country? Why is it that even today Indians are viewed as third-class citizens in so many corners of the world? Why are we so hell-bent on dubbing the brutal attacks on Indian students in Australia as "just another incident"? Why is it that despite possessing the richest of all mineral and natural resources, the menacing ghost called poverty still continues to haunt us like never before? These may seem uncomfortable questions to answer, but the day we all learn to tackle these questions without the slightest of inhibitions, is the day we would mature as a nation.

Why do so many of us still need to be reminded of the courtesy of standing up when the National Anthem is being played? Well, of course, one may argue that it is his or her personal choice at the end of the day, but does it really make one poorer to pay just a minute's respect to the National Anthem of our motherland? Exerting our legs just for a minute for the sake of our country would neither make our legs fall off, nor would it seriously damage our prestige or dignity. But still, we don't even think twice before making this a national issue of debate. It pained me when a national news channel of repute went to the lengths of devoting its entire prime-time viewing period over discussing this trivial issue. It is amazing that we still have the mentality of wasting our precious time and energy on discussing such nonsensical issues, when the country is being ripped apart by so many problems from all sides. We are living in a dangerous age, were even paying the minimum of respects to our National Anthem can be labelled by the modernists as "pseudo-patriotism".

Try sniffing the air around you, you would feel the bad smell coming from Indian politics. It is almost like the stench of avarice. A quagmire of a million problems have gripped the country. The growing strain in relations with its neighbours has started complementing the more traditional evils like illiteracy, poverty and over-population. It no longer bothers us when the Chinese break through our north-eastern borders and lay claims on our land. Maybe a few initial reactions pour in on the several 24-hour news channels, but that's just about it. Life moves on, and soon everything is relegated to the darkest corners of our memories. Barring a few, most of our leaders seem to have other things on their minds. Making hay while the sun shines and indulging in petty political gains seem to be the number one priorities on the cards. The real issues always seem to get lost within this muddy state of eternal mess. Unfortunately, this infectious attitude seems to have actually taken hold of the common man as well, like a dreaded contagious disease. Somewhere down the line, we seem to have lost those very qualities which made us proud to be Indians.

But life cannot afford to move along like this. Hope is what keeps us alive, and without hope we cease to be humans. So still there is time, and still there is hope. Our country is a truly great nation, a nation whose destiny has been shaped by the blood and sweat of so many great individuals. It is a powerful land, and it can be made even more powerful. The destiny of a nation is not shaped by God, but it is shaped by the people. Yes, it is the people who determine the true greatness of a nation. Great nations are not born out of the destiny shaped by God, but they are born from the dreams of dreamers who dared to dream!!

Yes, we all have a dream.We dream of an India where a term called "religious intolerance" is non-existent, where everybody is an Indian irrespective of cast & creed, where human freedom and dignity is not compromised with, where the girl-child is adored and not considered a burden, where people are free from the clutches of poverty & illiteracy, where education is considered a basic necessity, where every child can grow up to its full potential and make the country proud.

Yes, that is the India we all dream of. It is not just a Utopian dream, it is a dream which would indeed be a reality, if we all joined hands to make it one. The road ahead is tough and complicated, and is fraught with hazards and uncertainties. But beyond the cruel desert of harsh challenges and obstacles,lies our beautiful destination---which is a wonderland called India!!

"You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one,

I hope someday you will join us, and the world will live as one."

--John Lennon

When Tragedy Turned Itself Into Comedy

Today I am going to share with you all another personal experience of my life, although this one probably won't be even half as colourful as the previous one which I had described. But still, my stupid intellect is somehow telling me that this would be an experience worth sharing. Even though what I am going to share now was highly embarrassing when it actually happened, but still this incident occupies a very special place in my heart. This may partly be due to the common childhood nostalgia which is attached with it.

Every year a cultural program of some sort is organized by the residents of the locality where we stay. We all eagerly look forward to the event, since it gives multi-talented people like us to showcase the various deeds (and misdeeds) that we are capable of. But on a serious note, the annual cultural program is really a very joyous occasion for all of us. It brings together the residents of our "para" and makes us all feel like a single happy joint family. That is something which rarely happens during other times of the year, except probably during the four days of Durga Puja.

Anyway, let's cut the introduction short and try to get on with the actual story. The year I am talking about is 2003. We had a notorious group of friends in the true sense of the term (ask those poor residents who had to change their broken window panes every time we played cricket!) Anyway, somehow somebody in our group managed to put forward a brilliant idea that we should make our presence felt in the cultural program as well. But merely proposing an idea wasn't enough, we had to reach a consensus on something we could perform. After much deliberation and heated arguments, we finally managed to zero in on something worthwhile. A consensus was reached, and we eventually decided to perform "Julius Caesar". Well, of course, there were several reasons which influenced the choice we made. First of all, he was one of the few global historical characters whom we admired a lot, and secondly, the play was once a part of our English syllabus, so we were kind of familiar with the lines.

The choice of the play had been made, now came the dreaded prospect of assigning particular roles to different individuals. We were well aware of the kind of quarrelsome nature each one of us had, and so we silently prayed that the assignment of roles would not create any furore among those who were deprived of bagging the more meatier roles. But luckily for all of us, our apprehensions did not materialize and everything was settled in an amicable manner. It was decided amongst us that a boy named Rajesh (names have been changed on request) was going to be Brutus and a very tall boy named Neel would play the role of Julius Caesar. But it was a pity that the role of Caesar was actually the shortest of all roles, since Caesar had nothing much to do apart from lying on the desk and pretending to be dead. And as for me, I actually had the guts to consider myself the best elocutionist of the lot, and so I donned the role of Mark Antony-cum-director. Being the director was something which I regretted later, and the reasons why I did so would become clear very soon.

Our rehearsals went on in a fairly smooth manner, except for a few hiccups here and there. Being the director, sometimes I could not resist the usual directorial urge of shouting at people when they were careless enough to forget the lines. I have lost count of how many times I had to shout out loud. But believe me, I wasn't acting as the usual grumpy director when I did so. Any sane human being would have gone mad at the antics which were displayed on the stage. I just failed to understand how one could pretend to be dead with one leg sticking up in the air!! But things like these were exactly what I had to witness. But anyway, we practiced and rehearsed diligently till we were sure that we were going to display the most heart-wrenching tragedy ever acted out on stage. But little did we know about the truly wonderful surprise which was waiting to greet us!

On the day of the program, we found out that we were slated to be the last performers on stage. Honestly speaking, that was a prospect which we truly relished, since that would give us the golden opportunity to snigger at the other performances before we could act out our masterpiece! Aha, how could we ever let such a golden chance slip away? Pure devils in disguise, weren't we? We roared out in laughter when the performances began. Oh my God! Did they call that acting or what? Then, finally, the opportune moment came for us to stage our own performance.

We all waited in the wings as Rajesh entered the stage dressed up as Brutus. He staged an otherwise perfect entry apart from tripping over the electric wire and falling flat on his face. The audience was busy laughing out loud and I truly cursed them from the bottom of my heart. Was it so very unnatural for someone to trip over a wire? What a dumb audience, for God's sake! In the meantime, Brutus was back to his senses, and we all rejoiced at that fact. Now would be the grand beginning of a true masterpiece, wow!! But the next thing that Brutus did was to face the audience with a facial expression that could best be linked with the expression of an agitated goat. He managed to croak out just a few inaudible words before we came and dragged him off the stage. Then it was time for me to make my grand entry, and I was more than determined to undo the effects of the mess created before me. But alas! Having only determination is sometimes not enough in life. Destiny always has a crucial role to play, whether we like it or not.

After my entry on to the stage, I carried off my speech pretty well and that started increasing my confidence. But the increase in confidence resulted in severe over-confidence which brought about my glorious downfall. I began jerking my head in such a carefree and confident manner that my wig fell off! The audience had again started to burst into peels of laughter. What a perfectly dumb audience! What was there to laugh? What was so humorous about somebody's wig coming off? Oh God, people and their atrocious sense of humour! In the meantime, I had picked up my wig and had immediately put it back again. The next two or three minutes went on well without any more memorable mishaps. But little did we know that we had saved our best for the last. Before we could realize anything, our "dead" Julius Caesar let out a grand fart, complete with all kinds of sensory effects! The next thing we all did was to run away from the place as fast as we could. I don't think there was any other option left in front of us.

But nevertheless we managed to receive cheerful applause for our performance. One guy came to congratulate me and said he had never laughed so hard in his life. It was actually good for him that I let him go with just one black eye! I was heart-broken and livid at the same time. My first directorial venture had gone up in flames right before my eyes. And believe it or not, our act was eventually labelled as the "best comedy". Has anyone ever heard of "Julius Caesar" getting the distinction of being called the best comedy??? Well, that can only be achieved by great individuals like us, and we are proud of that!! I am sure that Mr Shakespeare himself would have been proud of our achievement. He must have been laughing in glee! A heart-rending tragedy had been transformed into a comedy of errors!!!

My First Visit To A Nightclub

Today I am going to make an effort to describe what my first ever visit to a nightclub actually turned out to be like. Well, I am not ashamed to say that I was just of the tender age of 15 when I made my first entry into a celebrated nightclub of Calcutta (let's keep the name of the place a secret). The fact that I had the guts to visit the place at that age has also been kept a secret from my parents for reasons that are obvious. Well, I would try my best not to make this a boring account, so here goes my attempt....

Firstly, let me disclose that prior to visiting a nightclub, I had a very poor impression of what such a place would actually be like. To tell the truth, like an innocent 15 year old, all I knew about a nightclub was the fact that it was supposed to be a place where people danced like maniacs, got drunk to the hilt and then a bunch of other weird activities followed. That was my notion of a nightclub in a nutshell, poor me!!! So initially I was damn scared of visiting a place about which I held such a terrible impression in my mind. In fact, if it wasn't for my extremely benevolent elder cousin brothers and sisters, I would never have visited the place at the age of 15. But what to do? They were so very keen on letting their kid brother experience the beauties of life, hehehe.

Now let's get down to the actual crux of what I want to say. The first thing which scared the living daylights out of me was the gigantic build of a group of people who I later learnt were known as "bouncers", and that their job was to kick out unruly hoodlums. I became completely motionless after hearing that, and it took me quite some time to regain my senses. Then came the next part, the part about my grand entry into the nightclub!! I could hear from outside the sound of music (not the Hollywood movie, but some Arabic song whose name I don't seem to remember), and I made up several impressions in my mind regarding what I was going to see after my entry. But all I could eventually see was the sight of ten odd couples gyrating to the tune of that pathetic song (it really was pathetic!!). The mere sight of them moving their bodies all at once in that comical manner made me burst into peels of laughter (even though I am not a very good dancer myself). I was just beginning to make sense of what was happening over there, when all of a sudden, I was literally pulled to the dance floor by my cousin sister. Oh god!! My worst fear had come true, I was there in the middle of the dance floor looking like a complete fool with nothing to do. But the realization hit me that I had to do something. All the nervousness had made me deaf to the music around me, but that was the least of my worries. There was an army of people staring at the dance floor and I was looking like a complete idiot!!! At my last attempt to salvage some pride, I reluctantly started to take a few steps (the combination of those steps cannot be described as an attempt to dance, but still I tried). That sequence went on for five more torturous minutes, and after that, I immediately fled from the dance floor. Phew!!! I thought that at last I had made my escape.

But I was so very wrong!!! Escape was still a long long way away. Now comes the most shocking part. Here it goes....

Mind you, at that time, I was only 15 years old. Even though I had the idea that people are attracted to the opposite sex, but I was completely alien to the concepts of homosexuality and my innocent mind had never figured out that such people even existed, and it was this ignorance which caught me completely off-guard. Let me try to describe what exactly happened, even though it is very difficult for me to do so. I was standing at a corner doing nothing, when suddenly a guy came and patted me on the back. He initiated a normal conversation and asked me my name and other similar things like that. At no point of time did I realize what was about to happen a few minutes later. Like any other polite human being, I also responded to his questions in a polite manner (when somebody enquires about your name, it is sometimes impossible not to reply to it). After some time, he offered me a drink of beer which I accepted (today I realize that it was a wrong thing to do). But alas, I was just a 15 year old and I did not have the maturity to understand what was right and what was wrong. I went on and took a few sips of beer, without suspecting that things would go so horribly wrong in the next few moments.

I had just begun to regain my composure after drinking the beer, when suddenly out of the blue, the guy beside me caught hold of my butt!!! I was too shell-shocked to do anything, for a few moments I just stood there numb with fear. I don't remember everything very clearly, but this much I remember that after standing still for sometime, I let out a shrill scream!!! That was all I could do, since I was too scared to do anything else. After that, things became blurry. All I remember is that on hearing me scream out loud, a few people immediately came to my rescue and I was freed from the clutches of that monster (yes, he was a monster!!!). I came to know later that the people who rescued me on that fateful night were none other than the bouncers themselves, the very people of whom I was so very scared. After that incident, I never ever felt scared of bouncers again, hehehe.

Well, that was all about the episode which actually happened. When I retrospect about the incident today, I feel that maybe it was wrong on my part to visit a nightclub at that young an age. But then again, thousands of young people visit nightclubs every single night and manage to come out unscathed. Maybe it was my wretched luck which made me the victim of that horrible incident, or maybe it was something else. Actually, I did not possess the inclination and energy to find out the reasons for that. So after a few months, I forgot almost everything about it, I really did. Now after all these years, I have tried to write about it. I have tried my best to be accurate, as far as my limited memory could permit. Whether the account is readable or avoidable I don't know, but I have tried my best to present the facts in the best possible manner.

And oh yes, one thing surely needs to be mentioned in the end. Even though I have visited every single nightclub in the city at a later stage of my life, but somehow I have always managed to give that particular place a miss. The visit I have talked about was my first and last visit to that place, and I don't regret the fact that it turned out to be like that. Somehow I had developed an aversion towards that place which has stayed with me till today.